Name: Rachel
Age: 42
Location: Currently Rockford, IL originally from Pickneyville, IL
Children: Son, Jordan -18  and daughter, Olivia - 16 
Favorite Bible Verse: Isaiah 43:2

Rachel grew up in a home where drinking and drugs were normalized. Her mother struggled with addiction. Rachel followed in her footsteps from a young age and all through her adult life. She and her mother lived together and used together. 
When Rachel was 40 years old her mother passed away.
​ Unable to pay the bills on her own, Rachel found herself living on the streets, eating food that restaurants threw out, and consumed by
​meth and heroin.
​

Rachel had been to rehab several times in the past, but entered again in April of 2019. 

This time was different. 
​
God placed her with a counselor that offered to pray with her (pictured above) and for the first time Rachel chose to surrender her addiction and her life to Christ. 
Next she watched as God moved mightily on her behalf. 
Time and time again he performed miracles that set Rachel on the road of recovery. 

Miracle Number One
​What is typically a thirty day program ended up being a three month program for her.
 
God
saw to it that she had an extended period of time to remain in a safe place where she built her relationship​ with him. 

Miracle Number Two
​
While in inpatient treatment she had to consider where she would go when she completed the program.
She was essentially homeless, but she also had legal involvement that could dictate where she must live upon discharge. 
On a long shot, Rachel applied to a recovery home in Rockford, Il.
She wasn't sure the judge would approve for her to move five hours from where she had to report for court proceedings.
This was a very anxious and uncertain time for her.  
 Weeks went by and she had not heard from the recovery home.
​She was losing hope and ready to give up. 
She came to her counselor and they prayed together. 
At that VERY moment the phone rang.
​The recovery home informed her that she had been accepted into their program.

The courts approved her transition and she moved away from everything she had ever known.
After so many years of drug charges and time spent in and out of jail -
She is now a huge success story in Franklin County, Illinois. 

God lead her on a journey that consisted of his favor upon her in the recovery home. 
She was cared for by amazing counselors.
​She continued to grow her relationship with Jesus and develop healthy coping skills. 
Relationships with her family were repaired. 
He blessed her with a great paying job that provides her the ability to help support her children.
She now has her own apartment and is a productive member of society. 
He has used her to be an integral member of AA and NA.
​She has even had the opportunity to go back to her old recovery home, tell her story, and inspire others. 
Through it all there is one consistent factor - God. 
Not only did she surrender to his will, his way, she chose him over and over. 
In each difficult situation, she ran to him!
When she wanted to make her own decisions she consulted him first. 
She stopped trying to control her destiny and allowed the designer of the whole world to work through her instead. 

On her two year sobriety anniversary she was able to help her daughter get ready for prom. 
A couple weeks later she was present for her son's high school graduation. 
How amazing!

Do you have 30 seconds to spend with Jesus today?
His word tells us to cast our cares on him, because he cares for us. 
Let's take him up on such a gracious offer! 

Today's message is one of hope. 
Hope for the person with an addiction.
Hope for the loved ones of the person addicted.
Hope for the adulterer and the abused.
Hope for the anxious and the angry.
Hope for the backslidden and the broken.
Hope for the depressed and the downtrodden.
Hope for the guilty and the gang member.
Hope for the hurting and the hopeless.
Hope for the imprisoned and the insecure.
Hope for the lost and the lonely.
Hope for marriages and the mistreated.
Hope for the powerless and the proud.
Hope for the resentful and the remorseful.
Hope for the sick and the suffering.
Hope for the community, the country, and the whole world. 
Hope for today, tomorrow, and forever. 
We have God. We have hope. 

After nearly a decade of being in the Social Work world, I've probably heard and used the words "coping skills" at least a million times. 

So what are coping skills and how on Earth are they going to help you through your loved one's addiction?
A coping skill can be anything. 
Literally anything.
We all have coping skills.
​Some are healthy, some are not so healthy. 
The goal of any coping skill is to ease whatever hurt we are experiencing. 
But the goal of a healthy coping skill is to ease the hurt, while at the same time promoting safety and wellbeing. 

Wouldn't it be wonderful to have some useful tools that you could utilize during times of intense difficult emotion that would not only get you through the struggle, but leave you better off in the long run?

Acceptance is knowing that God has a plan and that I don't have to know the details to trust Him. I just need to read His word and Follow His direction. 
Reflect on that for a moment. 
Then ask yourself, "What does acceptance mean to me?"

Acceptance isn't always easy. In fact, in regard to the complicated dynamic of addiction, it is often times very difficult. 

If you've found yourself in an uphill battle attempting to grasp at any fraction of normalcy after a loved one's addiction has impacted your life, you are not alone. 

If you've found yourself in a downward spiral struggling with your own addiction and complicated chaos, you are not alone either.
Both roles in this scenario are equally heartbreaking. 
Acceptance is something we can all learn regardless of the position you find yourself in today. 

You didn't cause it. You can't control it. You can't cure it. 
Also known as the three C's.
​Which ultimately leads us to acceptance. 

No matter what your relationship to your loved one, it was not you that lead them to their addiction. Regardless if you raised them, played a major role in their upbringing, or feel that whatever you've put them through must be the cause, it's simply untrue.
​You do not have the power to cause someone else's addiction.  
They chose to drink/use and that is what has lead to their addiction. 
Accept that you did not cause it. ​

If you are like the majority of people who love someone with an addiction, you have tried to control your loved one or their addiction to at least some degree. 
You may have enabled them in an attempt to prevent them from being harmed. 
Perhaps you've deleted numbers of using friends, dumped out all of their alcohol or flushed their drugs. 
You've spent sleepless nights worrying about something that you cannot control. 
Accepting that the choice is theirs is often times the most difficult of the C's. 
I know it was for me. 
I left my first ALANON meeting feeling very angry. It was actually my first and last. 
I went there looking for answers about how I could heal my loved one. 
When they told me that I must accept that it is her choice - I thought what a waste of time. 
Many years later and through many, many attempts at trying to help her - I realized they were right. 
It didn't matter what I said or did. If she was not ready to quit, she wasn't going to. 
Accepting that we cannot control someone else's life choices is our "rock bottom." 
Until you've given it all you've got, you won't be able to detach. 
​Until you detach, you won't be able to accept that it is out of your control. 

As badly as we wish there was a cure for this disease - the reality is that this is oftentimes just a manageable chronic condition.
​Only Jesus can completely cure someone of this illness.
So while we can pray for a miracle, we can also prepare for ongoing treatment.

Think about alcohol and drug addiction the same way that you would think about diabetes. 
A person who has diabetes is not able to cure it, but they are able to make lifestyle changes to manage it. 
A person with an addiction is not in control of how their brain responds to drugs or alcohol, but they are responsible for managing it to whatever degree possible. 
Addiction is simply the byproduct of an underlying issue. 
Just as a person with diabetes must take medication to manage their illness, a person with an addiction will likely need to do the same. 
Whether it is medication to improve their mental health or specific medication designed to make them sick if they drink, either way, they are responsible for ensuring they do not drink or use. 

A person with diabetes will need to incorporate healthy activities in their life. 
So will a person with an addiction. 
A person with diabetes will have to be mindful of what they eat and eliminate certain foods and drinks. 
​A person with an addiction will also have to be mindful of what they consume and eliminate drugs and alcohol. 

We must accept that there is not a cure that we can provide. 
We can pray continually that God will choose to cure them, but if he doesn't, we must accept his sovereign answer. 

Dear Heavenly Father, 
Help us to accept your will for our life and the lives of the ones we love. We pray for our addicted loved ones. We pray that you would heal them from this disease.
We know that this is a big prayer, but we also know that we serve a big God.
We know that you are all powerful, all knowing, and that your wisdom surpasses far beyond ours. 
We are grateful that we can trust you.
When we can't see your plan, we can still trust your process.
You are faithful. 
God, I pray for everyone that is struggling with releasing control over these difficult situations. 
The more we focus on you, the less we have to focus on controlling anything else. 
Our lives are in your hands. 
Lord, you are the potter, we are the clay. 
Mold us. 
Change us from the inside out. 
Help us to focus more on improving ourselves and less on what we desire to change about anyone else. 
We thank you and praise your holy name!

In Jesus Name, 
Amen

Until Next Time, 

​Your Praying Friend

Is your mind full of anxious thoughts? To-do lists for today and worries about tomorrow?
Let's try to declutter our minds through the practice of mindfulness.